


So What's It Like? (I couldn't think of a better title)

by Osmanited2017



Category: Pointless (UK TV), The Chase (TV)
Genre: Anal Sex, Blowjobs, First Time, M/M, Threesome
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-11
Updated: 2020-10-11
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:54:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,536
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26954686
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Osmanited2017/pseuds/Osmanited2017
Summary: After accidentally finding out about Richard and Xander's out of the studio antics, Bradley starts to get curious.
Relationships: Alexander Armstrong/Richard Osman, Alexander Armstrong/Richard Osman/Bradley Walsh
Comments: 2
Kudos: 1





	So What's It Like? (I couldn't think of a better title)

Bradley swallowed as he felt a lump form in his throat, but it did nothing to clear it.

It was an accident as well as an unsuitable place for Xander and Richard to commit such an act that Bradley had been unfortunate enough to have walked in on.

The sight of Richard on his knees with a very aroused Xander's cock in his mouth made him freeze and stare for a few moments before stammering an apology and closing the dressing room door again.

In the days after the event, no matter how much he tried, the image wouldn't leave his mind and left him waking in the middle of the night with tented boxers.

He talked to them about it since, again apologizing and assuring them that their secret was safe.

Every now and then he would catch himself watching them in public, but they acted like they were merely close friends and no one was any the wiser.

“So what’s it like?” he suddenly blurted out one day in the privacy of Richard’s dressing room.

“Having such high viewing figures?” Richard replied with amusement, “It’s wonderful. Maybe one day you’ll do as well as us.”

Bradley couldn’t help but huff out a laugh before lowering his voice.

“You know that’s not what I meant.”

He could see Richard was feeling awkward, worried even as he wouldn’t look in his direction.

“Why do you want to know?”

“Curious. While I’ve not said anything to anybody else…Fuck it Richard, I can’t forget it either.”

“So what is it you’re asking of us? To join in?”

The suggestion made Bradley blush and now it was his turn to be unable to look Richard in the eye, his gaze looking around the room.

“Would I be welcome? Just the once that is.” He quickly added; his finger and thumb unconsciously twisting his wedding ring as he spoke.

“Just once?”

“Just to know what it’s like.”

“And if we say no, you’re going to blab?”

“What? Lord no! Mate, if the answer is no then so be it, I will understand and respect that. Come on Rich, you know me better than that.”

“I know…I’m sorry I just…” Richard thought for a few moments, unconsciously tapping his fingers on the table as he did, “I’ll talk to Xander about it, but I’m not promising anything.”

“No, that’s fine.” He awkwardly crossed his arms and looked at anything that wasn’t Richard, “Obviously it really is okay if you don’t. Either way, I’m not going to breathe a word to anyone.”

A few days later when the text invite came about drinks at Richard’s place, he felt a shiver of anticipation run through him. He wasn’t sure if this was merely to discuss the request he’d made days earlier or whether his curious fantasy was going to become reality.

Having finished filming for the day, he used the studio’s showers and cleaned himself thoroughly, and without fail arrived on Richard’s doorstep dressed casual as always, but feeling like he was too small in his own skin.

Clasping the bottle of white wine firmly in one hand, he used his free hand to ring the doorbell. He heard it chime and moments later saw Richard’s tall silhouette appear in the frosted glass on the top of the door.

“Bradley.” Richard beamed, standing aside, “Come in.”

“Thanks Rich. I er,” he held up the bottle of wine, “I brought this.”

“Thank you. Come on through.”

Richard guided him to the living room where Xander was sat already drinking a glass of wine, eyes closed and humming along to a piece of classical music. He looked up when he heard them enter.

“Hey there, Xander, you alright mate?” Bradley said in as calm a voice as he could and holding out a hand nervously.

“Evening, I’m fine, you?”

“Yeah, I’m good.”

“Bradley came bearing a gift.” Richard said, handing over the bottle of wine to Xander for approval.

“Mmm, good choice. I’m glad since this one is almost empty. Not that it was opened this evening; we don’t want to be too drunk.”

With a nervous laugh, Bradley sat in an empty armchair and watched as Xander opened the bottle, poured some into a clean glass and proceeded to sniff and taste it.

Bradley glanced at Richard briefly who rolled his eyes and shook his head.

“You know it’s a good brand, Xander, so you don’t have to do the whole wine poncery thing.”

“Every harvest is different, Rich.”

“Yes, I know, you’ve said before and as riveting as your lecture was, I don’t think that’s what Bradley is here for.”

Xander couldn’t help but chuckle before pouring another clean glass and handing it over to Bradley.

“Want some, Rich?”

“No I’m good, thanks babe.” Richard says with a grin as Bradley almost chokes on his mouthful at the endearment.

“So,” Xander started, pouring himself another half glass, “you erm…want to see what “it’s” like?”

“Erm…yes, but only if you’re actually okay with it. I mean, we can sit here, drink, and be merry if I’m intruding. As I told Richard before, even if you had said no, I wouldn’t have told anyone about you two. Your secret is safe with me, I promise you that.”

Xander visibly relaxed, letting out a breath before smiling.

“I-we really appreciate it.” He assured, smiling over at Richard for a moment, “The real question is what do _you_ want?”

“I-I” Bradley stammered, his mind suddenly racing as he properly took in that it was about to happen, “I don’t…”

“I mean, what are you looking for exactly? A fondle and blowjob or do you want to experience full sex?”

Feeling slightly sweaty, Bradley felt slightly overwhelmed by the reality what he’d brought himself into. Clearing his throat and taking a large gulp of wine, he tried speaking properly.

“I er, the thing is, I’ve had a run of girlfriends, and my wife,” his fingers again unconsciously fiddled with his wedding ring, “who I love very dearly you understand. None of them have been willing to do anal, so…I guess I wanted to try it.”

Richard raised an eyebrow, looking over to Xander with a smile.

“Guess that answers that.”

Xander nodded in agreement.

“I guess it does. However, the rules are thus. One, condoms are a must. We both use them every time so I swear that it’s nothing personal against you. Two, no spanking or no dirty talk because seriously, it’ll just lead to fits of giggles. Three, we don’t talk about it in public afterwards, okay?”

“Yes that’s…that’s fine with me.” Bradley replied, clapping his hands together and hating how clammy they felt.

They didn’t rush themselves, but upon finishing their glasses, they avoided refilling them and instead made their way upstairs to the bedroom.

Every step made Bradley nervous, but he didn’t know why. He DID ask for this after all. It had been playing on his mind for a while now.

Granted he didn’t expect to be doing it with another man, and not with two people he’d known for years. But then what choice did he have? He couldn’t meet another woman for sex being he’s a known face off the telly, and he wasn’t lying he does love his wife, but she isn’t willing to give him this.

Escorted into the bedroom, he took in the double bed and wondered if they’d all fit on it.

Stripping their own clothes, like a typical schoolboy, Bradley got what he hoped were sly eyeful of the other two’s manhood’s. He guessed it came as no surprise that Richard was rather gifted in that department as he already sported a decent size while flaccid.

Xander was also what he’d call a decent size, and was already semi-hard. At one point as Xander bent over, he couldn’t help but take an opportunity to marvel at the man’s behind, which started bringing questions to his mind. What did it feel like to fuck him? How many times had Richard done the same?

“Liking what you see?” Richard said suddenly by his ear, making him jump.

“Hm?” Xander asked, turning around to join them on the bed.

“I just caught Bradley taking a nice long look at your arse as you were bending over.”

“Like I haven’t caught you doing the same many a time?” he said with a grin, sitting beside the bigger man.

“I know, but you know I can’t help myself.”

Richard’s hand reached over and gently squeezed one arse cheek before they turned their attention to Bradley who was sat gawping like they’d both suddenly grown two heads.

“So, how we get started on you?” Xander asked.

“I erm…well a blowjob would be nice.”

He still felt very much out of place, but his senses were in overdrive at the thoughts of what could happen tonight and he felt like he was a blushing virgin all over again.

“And for whom do you make this request.”

“Both?” he said without much thought, watching them look at each other in amusement.

“Both it is then.” Xander said with a grin, “Lie yourself down and get comfortable.”

They settled him propped up in the centre of the bed, his cock already semi-hard just from the anticipation.

“After you.” Richard said in amusement.

“Why thank you, Richard.”

As Bradley’s cock slowly slid between wet, warm lips, he sucked in a breath, closing his eyes tightly for a moment. Oh Xander knew what he was doing right from the off. He flicked his tongue in all the right places to taking him fully down his throat with practiced ease.

When he opened his eyes again, they locked onto Xander’s, staring as his cock disappeared fully again.

“Oh fuck.” He whispered, yelling it again louder when Xander swallowed around him.

“Mmm,” Richard agreed, humming in his ear, “he is _very_ good at doing that.”

Richard’s hand was hovering inches from touch, eyes asking for permission. Swallowing, Bradley nodded, closing his eyes again and letting the sensations wash over him.

As the long slender fingers of Richard’s started to run circles across the skin of his chest then up his neck, he wondered if he should be doing something in return.

Before he got a chance to ask, Xander’s mouth released his now fully stiff cock out into the warm air of the room.

“Right it’s your turn, Rich.”

They switched places, and Xander took over exploration of Bradley’s skin, fingers gliding across sparse chest hair and along his navel.

Bradley noticed Richard was more apprehensive and not taking him fully the way Xander had, but his tongue certainly knew what it was doing as it ran rings around the sensitive head.

“I didn’t think watching you suck someone else could actually be damn hot.” Xander said, gently stroking his own erection.

“Jealous?” Bradley asked with a smirk.

“Hmmmm. A bit.”

“Well you know, Xander, he did want both of us.”

“So he did.”

Moving himself back down, Xander returned to sucking along the length of his shaft whilst Richard sucked on each of Bradley’s balls in turn.

Moving his mouth to join Xander, their tongues licked together, working up to the head where their lips met, kissing with the sensitive head caught in between.

Bradley shuddered repeatedly at the double onslaught of wet tongue, letting out small moans and curses.

“Everything okay there?” Richard asked with a smug expression.

“Oh fuck, I swear you two are trying to kill me or something. Please don’t suck any more or this will all be over too soon.”

He didn’t want to cum yet. It had been years since he’d needed to be hard twice in 2 night so had no idea how long his recovery time was going to be, if at all.

Xander leaned over, whispering something to Richard that made him grin, and Bradley watched as a tube of lubricant and condoms appeared on the bed.

“Now,” Richard said with confidence, “am I right in understanding, my dear Bradley, that you are interested in fucking Xander?”

Finding himself again rendered speechless, the man could not form a proper reply, so merely nodded. After clearing his throat several times, in a husky whisper he spoke.

“If that’s okay of course?”

Richard looked over to the other man who nodded.

“No complaints from me.” He replied, slowly stroking his hand along Bradley’s hard wet length again like he was measuring each inch as he went, “You take a few moments to come down a bit. Don’t mind us.”

Bradley watched and admired the trust between them as Richard cleaned Xander’s hole with a wet wipe and then slowly work lubricated fingers in to stretch him whilst Xander was now giving the bigger man’s erection attention as he lapped at the pre-cum that was already dribbling across his hand.

It was too much for Bradley and he had to close his eyes again. He wasn’t gay, he was sure of it, and yet watching his two friends intimately stimulate each other was having a desirable effect on him. What the heck was going on?

No, he wasn’t going to think about it. He was here to experience anal just this once with people he could trust; a favour between friends and nothing more.

Breathing slightly heavily, Richard gazed down into the smaller man’s eyes, hands resting on his head and gently stroking his hair before very gently thrusting a bit further into his mouth.

Three large fingers were now inside Xander, stretching and spreading the lubricant around with each gentle thrust.

“I’d say that’s sufficient enough, thank you Rich.” he turned his attention back to their guest, “Do you feel you’ve come down enough?”

“Yeah, I’m-I’m good.”

With a condom slipped over his cock, Bradley bit his lip as Xander straddled his thighs to then slowly sink down onto him. He didn’t know what to do to help or if he could, so decided to gently stroke Xander’s thigh and was relieved when his hand wasn’t swatted away.

Reaching the root, Xander let out a small sigh. The warmth and tightness around him made Bradley curse repeatedly under his breath.

“Feels good?” Richard asked Xander, kissing down his neck and receiving a silent lazy nod in response, “What about you, Bradders, you like?”

Bradley cleared his throat before getting his words out.

“Oh mate, I never expected it to feel this tight. I don’t think it’s ever felt this good.”

“I haven’t even started moving yet!” Xander said with a laugh, wiggling around a few moments before starting to ride him, slowly at first.

“Oh my god.” Bradley said several times, his hands unconsciously grabbing Xander’s hips, pulling him down as he thrust up, enjoying the moans of the man above him “Fuck! You feel so good, mate.”

He kept up steadily thrusting, his mind blocking out any thoughts about his wife who was no doubt sat at home with no clue what he was doing right now and with whom.

Feeling breath on his face, he opened his eyes to find himself eye-to-eye with a slightly panting Xander, his hands digging into the pillows either side of Bradley’s head.

Above him, Xander’s mouth rose into an amused smile, and there was an urge suddenly to kiss those lips. Puckering just slightly, Bradley tried to lean his head up enough so their lips could connect. He saw Xander flinch before moving himself back up out of reach.

Maybe it was for the best that they didn’t. He looked over at his wedding ring, feeling like it was somehow tightening itself on his finger. Definitely best he took what he was offered and didn’t push his luck.

His thrusts began to slow, and he huffed out a laugh.

“Sorry, but you’ve almost worn me out.”

“Don’t worry about it, mate, I’ve got this.

As Xander took over again, his speed shifted up a gear and Bradley could feel his orgasm building rapidly. Whimpering again, he whispered Xander’s name, praying he couldn’t hear him. Thrashing his head side to side on the pillow, he didn’t want it to end yet, but it felt inevitable that soon it would.

Questions started popping up in his mind. Was this really a onetime thing? Could he take a chance on asking again? Should he return the favour and assist Xander to orgasm too?

The latter was answered for him when he saw Richard getting himself comfortable beside him, his cock fully erect and prepped with a condom covered generously in more lubricant. Xander really had his work cut out; especially as Richard was unsurprisingly slightly larger and thicker.

Like a sudden tonne force, Bradley came with stars behind his eyelids. His breath held still as his hips gave one last powerful thrust upwards, blunt nails digging into Xander’s thighs and holding him in place.

“Oh fuck, fuck, fuck!” the words tumbled from his mouth with no filter, his body shaking and hips still thrusting very slightly until he was fully spent, “Oh my God, Xander! Fuck!”

He couldn’t remember the last time he felt an orgasm so intense, and he wished he could feel it like this again. Shuddering, he finally let Xander go, his whole body feeling limp in his post-orgasm haze.

“Enjoy that, did we?” Xander asked, the amused smile there again.

Bradley nodded with a dopey grin on his face.

“Oh dear,” Richard said with a laugh, “I think you’ve short-circuited his brain, Xander.”

“I think we’ll have to drop him on his doorstep, ring the doorbell then run off. I’m sure as hell not explaining to his wife what we did to him.”

“What YOU did to him.”

“And I’m about to do the same to you.”

Bradley’s heart thudded in his chest in time with his cock as it flagged, and he instantly missed the tight heat as Xander slowly climbed off of him, easing himself now into Richard.

While they continued on, Bradley slipped his condom off and wrapped it in tissues, followed by cleaning himself up with some of the wet wipes also sitting on the bedside table.

Now he wasn’t sure what to do. Should he sit and watch? Could he? Or should he wait downstairs until they finish? It seemed it didn’t matter if he did stay as they were two wrapped up in each other to notice.

He decided to go to the toilet in that time and on his return he saw Richard had turned them over, his hips thrusting in and out and hitting the right spot each time, making Xander moan repeatedly.

Clutching onto Richard’s arms, Xander wrapped his thighs around the larger man’s hips, pulling him closer until he could get their lips to awkwardly meet. Only at this did Richard slow his movements, their kiss gentle and heartfelt.

It was there and then Bradley realised that this wasn’t just mates having sex; they were in love. The confirmation came when Richard mouthed “Love you” to him and he had to smile at that. All the jokes over the years and at some point they’d worked it out and it became a reality.

Remaining at the door, he continued to watch as they reached their own climaxes, whispering words of love and affection to each other.

All satisfied, Bradley entered again, sitting on the bed a moment to slip his boxers on and gathered up the rest of his clothing.

He hadn’t really thought about the aftermath. What exactly should he say after what just happened between them?

“You alright, Brad?” Richard asked, clearly concerned.

Standing, he turned and smiled.

“Yeah. That was…bloody hell. I’m worn out and I didn’t have to do much.”

This now felt so awkward for him, unable to tear his eyes away from how despite now sitting back on the mattress, they were still half in an embrace.

“Anyway, I’ll see you both in the morning.” He said, trying to not run from the room, “Goodnight.”

Lying in bed staring at the ceiling, he tried to properly process what had just happened that night. Even better was whether he could easily look his wife in the eye the next day. After all, it was just sex and nothing more. He loved her.

Faintly he could hear snoring from the other room and he chuckled to himself. They’d finally got together after years of jokes, especially from Richard, about how they were a couple.

The next time he opened his eyes, it was now light out and there was movement downstairs. Reaching to the bedside table, he turned the small alarm clock to face him. 8:32AM.

He groaned and gradually got himself into a sitting position. The events of the night before ran through his mind and he smiled. Although he knew he couldn’t tell anyone else what happened, he knew that there was no forgetting what it felt like to have both presenters of the rival show sucking on his cock.

Standing, he let out a muffled groan at the ache in his back. He was too old for this.

Stepping for the bedroom, he headed straight to the bathroom to shower. The first cold jets definitely woke him up before the water warmed, cleaning away any leftover evidence of what happened the night before.

Feeling fresh, if hair still a bit damp, he headed downstairs where Richard was sat at the table with a cup of tea in one hand and his phone in another as he scrolled through what was probably twitter.

“Morning Rich.”

“Morning. Did you sleep well?”

“Yeah, not bad. Took me a little while to go off, and woke up with aches in muscles I forgot I had.”

“Yeah, Xander will do that to you. So did last night end your curiosity?”

“Yeah, I’d say it did. I tell you what, and I know you’ll know, but anal is a totally different feeling. And Xander knows what he’s doing. I thought the poor guy had a lot of work, you know, making both of us happy.”

He felt his words stumbling and he felt as awkward as he did the night before.

“No, that came out wrong. I’m making him sound like a prostitute or something. Sorry, I didn’t mean to. I’m just saying…Look, forget what I said, it’s my morning gibberish.”

Nervously he looked at his watch.

“Seriously though, thank you for letting me experience that. I should probably get going.”

“You don’t have to. The kettle is still got. Come on, I don’t want things to go weird now.”

“Yeah, you’re right. I just...Look, last night…for one crazy moment, I got an urge to kiss him, but he moved to make sure I didn’t.”

Richard merely nodded at this, turning away and busily making Bradley some tea.

“I don’t even know why I was going to…must’ve been a heat of the moment thing…but he kissed you without question. So…you know, is this a proper relationship?”

Again, Richard just nodded.

“Tell him I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t realize until then that it was serious between you two, and if I’d have realised sooner, I wouldn’t have dared try.”

“I very much doubt he’d hold it against you since you didn’t know about us.” He gave a small smirk as he handed the mug over, “That and he has a _very_ kissable mouth.”

“It’s the grin that did it.”

“Yeah, it’s adorable. Glad I’m not the only one who noticed it.”

“So how long have you been together?”

“About three months. We’ve been keeping it quiet, what with his divorce not completed yet.”

“So when did it…?”

“It wasn’t the reason for his divorce.” He suddenly said defensively, “Sorry... His marriage was already over before we got together. Hannah is the only other person who knows right now because she deserved to know.”

“How did she take it?”

“She actually took it fine. Since she’d already moved on, well, was having an affair behind Xander’s back so she was glad he had moved on. At one point she said “You’re welcome” to me. It felt quite...wrong.”

“I guess what with all those jokes over the years.”

“I know, but I didn’t mean to...I mean, sure I’ve been in love with him for years, but I never wanted his heart to be broken like that. I was fine with just being friends with him until my dying days if that was all I could have. When Xander suddenly came to me and told me his feelings I was worried at first that it was nothing more than a rebound.”

“You still think that now?”

“If he’s faking it then he’s damn good at it. We’ve been good to each other, and I’m willing to believe he’s serious.”

“Mate, have you talked to him about it? You need to be honest with him to make this work.”

“Get you dishing out the early morning relationship advice.”

“Mate, I’ve got just as much experience as you. You know, maybe having moments together with dressing room doors locked will also help keep things on the quiet until you’re ready to tell all?”

“I swear that door was locked. The following Monday I had to change rooms because it turned out the lock was faulty. Xander freaked quite spectacularly after that and we were so lucky it was the last filming for that week. It took me most of the weekend to assure him things weren’t going to suddenly all fall apart. We really do appreciate you keeping quiet.”

“I don’t think anyone would believe me if I did dare tell them anyway. But I must say you two seem good together.”

Richard smiled.

“I don’t think I’ve ever had a relationship that’s so relaxing. Maybe it’s because we’re both getting on in years and the hardest part is over. When I feel like a cheeky afternoon nap on a slow day, he often feels the same and we kip on the sofa together for an hour or so then either Xander cooks us something or we get a takeaway delivered.”

“He hasn’t been trying to improve your culinary skills then?”

“Oh he has tried bless him, but I’m still absolutely useless.”

Drinking down the last from his mug, Bradley looked at his watch again.

“I’m due at the studio in about an hour’s time, so I’d best see about going. You’ll both be back in on Thursday then?”

“Yes, we will. No doubt we’ll see you then.”

Several weeks had gone by, and despite bumping into each other several times in the studio building, they didn’t mention anything about what happened.

Bradley promised himself that the one opportunity he was given would indeed be the only time, but then that niggling happened again. This time however, it was something different.

He didn’t know if they’d welcome him in again, but then if you don’t ask you don’t get, right?

“Everything okay there, Bradley?”

“So what’s it like…” he asked in a hushed tone, “you know, being fucked?”

Xander’s mouth curved up into a smile.

“You want to find out?”


End file.
